My Deodorant is Giving Out

I’ve always found it curious that Jesus would heal people and then give them strict instructions not to publicize it. But we see that when they ignored his instructions, the crowds grew so great that Jesus could no longer move freely among the people and had to retreat to private places. So there was a legitimate reason to keep things hush-hush. No, Jesus wasn’t a showman like Benny Hinn.

But what about today’s Christianity? I’ve been thinking lately of the tendency I’ve had in times past to promote my church instead of promoting Christ. And I’m beginning to conclude that we need to be Jesus-focused, not ‘ministry’-focused. A local radio station (WMUZ, FM103.5 in Detroit) promotes itself as “the light”, even though Jesus said that he was the light of the world. Jesus also stated that we (Christians) are the light of the world, but what about a Christian-based business? Is it also the light? (more…)

Tim Horton’s has proved the point why multi-word URLs don’t work. Is the above URL supposed to be read

 Roll up the rim to win

or

Roll up ther,  i’m towin’!

Subclassing and instantiation are features of modern object-oriented computer programming languages. The efficiency of this methodology allows the programmer to reuse common code to define new objects. When defining a new object, instead of reinventing the wheel, the new object can inherit properties from an existing object, leaving the programmer only to define the new object’s unique aspects. For example:

Basic Object: House
Its properties:

• Square feet
• # of bedrooms
• House style (ranch/bungalow/colonial)
• Address
• Year built

Detailed Object: Rental House
Its properties:

• Inherit all the properties of a house (sq ft, # of bedrooms, etc)
• Monthly rent
• Lease start date
• Lease expire date

Instantiation is the act of taking one of these definitions and applying it to a specific instance (such as describing a specific rental house).

Subclassing and instantiations are truly the brainchild of God. These ingenious features are evidenced in DNA. Often the DNA sequence for a single gene actually codes for multiple proteins. The way this happens is that a RNA copy of the DNA is made. The RNA copy is then spliced at precise predetermined points by various molecular editing machines. However, sometimes whether or not (or where) this splicing occurs is random (50/50 or 33/33/33). Other times the splicing points are weighted, resulting in a fairly consistent ratio of output proteins. Other times the splicing points are completely predetermined, and not susceptible to outside influence. The resulting “family of proteins” that result from this splicing often have related but separate functions. In this way, DNA code is essentially compacted, and then subclassed in its expression. In humans, the majority of proteins are reliant on this mechanism of splicing to get from gene to protein. The amazing thing about all of this is the body’s intricate feedback mechanisms that are constantly maintaining these delicate and precisely-controlled balances necessary for life to work.

An update on the situation. The church being bullied by the Assemblies of God Michigan District is appealing the circuit court’s decision. So the saga continues, perhaps another year or two…

I have a message for Odwalla, Inc., makers of the Superfood Odwalla Bar. If you’re going to make your snack bar brown with a greenish spray-covering, I’d suggest the bar’s packaging state that the product’s intended color is green. The first time I had a Superfood Odwalla Bar, I had to Google the bar to make sure the green wasn’t mold. Packing it in green packaging doesn’t cut it.

Beware, American churches! Affiliation with a religious denomination may cost your church its property! Welcome to the death of American religious freedom. Beware of putting your blood, sweat, and tears into the property owned by a local church ministry that is affiliated with a formal religious denomination! (Did I just say that?)

A circuit court judge has ruled that the Assemblies of God Michigan District (AOG) has the right to commandeer the property of a small church in southeast Warren, MI. This is despite the fact that the church’s constitution and bylaws prescribed specific conditions and limitations upon the situations that would cause their property to revert to AOG. Specifically, the church’s constitution states that if the church were to ever defect from the AOG Statement of Fundamental Truths, their property would revert to AOG. What is the AOG Statement of Fundamental Truths? A list of doctrinal truths, such as the belief that Jesus Christ was divine. You can view them here. You’ll observe that the Statement of Fundamental Truths have nothing to do with denominational polity or agreement of a local church to submit to AOG’s denominational rules. There is nothing to do with affiliation with AOG itself. But the judge in this case has essentially ruled that an affiliation with a religious organization based on doctrinal agreement now gives them right to your property.

The AOG has its own constitution and bylaws. These are model rules that their member churches then tailor into their own unique constitution and bylaws. The AOG Michigan District bylaws in their current form (conspicuously absent from their website - perhaps to avoid scaring away prospective member churches) provide for local church property to transfer to them in the event of either a defection from the faith or defection from affiliation with the AOG. But the Warren church’s bylaws provide only for property transfer to AOG if the church were to defect from the faith. Whose rules win? The circuit court says the denomination’s rules win. It should be noted that the AOG General Council constitution and bylaws (which are available online) encourage churches to own and manage their own property. There is no property reversion clause there. But contrast these to the Michigan District’s constitution and bylaws. The AOG Ohio District constititution and bylaws now contain the same devious “property reversion” clause as the Michigan District. Read it here. Note that it reads, “The Ohio District Council recommends that the following be placed in the charter and/or constitution of each church…” So you see, they’re trying to trick you into placing the damning language in your church’s own constitution. But it really doesn’t matter. Even though the Warren, Michigan church’s constitution does not contain this reversion clause in its language, the AOG Michigan District is arguing that the language of the Michigan District’s constitution/bylaws trumps the language in the church’s constitution. This is deceitful.

The church’s constitution/bylaws clearly stated that its affiliation with AOG was according to the bylaws of the church itself, not the bylaws of the denomination. But the judge has overlooked this conditional clause and ruled that the Warren church is unconditionally subject to AOG rules, no matter how arbitrary. The judge has ruled that the church’s voluntary association with AOG was tantamount to throwing their property rights away. So now the first amendment’s prohibition on secular courts interfering with religious polity is the twisted excuse to allow a religious denomination to prey upon your local church while the courts look the other way.

Is your property worth $3 million? Better watch out. Your denomination may see your church property as the perfect fund-raising opportunity.

Think about how different this is from individual rights. Individuals in America have legal rights against corporations, employers, predatory lenders, and others that abuse them. When a consumer enters into a “voluntary cooperative” agreement with an auto dealer, does the consumer forfeit all their rights to health, protection, and the right to be advised of the product’s potential dangers? No. Is it legal for the dealer 2 weeks after the sale to amend his contract language to include a clause that gives the dealer possession of the customer’s house? Of course not. But that’s what AOG Michigan/Ohio Districts have done with their recently modified constitution and bylaws. So now if a church wishes to secede from the AOG denomination because the state presbyters have gone wacky, the church may forfeit its property. Either that, or get worn out financially in David vs. Goliath lawsuits. The Warren church purchased and paid for its property with donations from its congregation. So why is AOG Michigan District attempting to “preserve” the church’s property for the AOG? We’ll discuss the motives in another post. But after reading comments in this blog comment, you’ll see that it isn’t the first time that AOG has taken a church’s property and then sold it to another denomination. “Liquidation” is a more appropriate description than “preservation”.

This is a bullying corporate takeover. This is opportunism at its worst, as the Assemblies of God Michigan District uses the guise of religious freedom to get the courts to look the other way while they steal property from an independent Michigan nonprofit corporation that made the fatal mistake of trusting them. Are you a Michigan AOG-affiliated church? Watch out. You may be next.

Sorry for the strange title, but we are starting in the middle of the story. Actually, possibly very near the end. Perhaps I’ll fill you in on the background another day. But for today, suffice it to say that the Assemblies of God (AOG) Michigan District may be on the verge of successfully stealing the property belonging to a small church in Warren, Michigan. This church has never received a dime from the AOG, either for the purchase/upkeep of the building or grounds, or for carrying out the ministry that Jesus Christ intends this local church to accomplish. Yet because the church decided to affiliate with AOG (on the basis of theological agreement with AOG fundamental doctrines), AOG decided it has the right to force the church to sign over its property and bank accounts. This despite the fact that the church is registered with the State of Michigan as an independent nonprofit corporation.

But what’s new about this? Just as corrupt religious leaders put the creator of the universe to death over 1970 years ago, so today corrupt religious leaders are oblivious to the consequences of uprooting a ministry that effectively evangelizes children in a high-turnover neighborhood in southeast Warren.

What predicated this event?  It started with unsubstantiated allegations (dictionary definition: slander). The AOG was asked to step in, not by the pastor or by the elders (in some churches called ’deacons’ or ‘bishops’), but by a renegade elder who acted the same way that Judas Iscariot did…he overstepped his spiritual shepherd (Jesus / the pastor) and went behind the back of his peers (the remaining 11 disciples / the remaining elders), and took matters into his own hands. Did the renegade elder make an honest effort to discuss the matter with the other elders first? No. A couple of off-the-cuff discussions, one completely misconstrued, and he was off to AOG.

So what did the AOG do? The AOG stepped in under the guise of performing an investigation. But did they do so on a true fact-finding mission? Yes, if your definition of fact-finding is immediately dismissing all the elders as church leaders, without ever even talking to them about anything…about the situation, about the allegations, nothing. Did the AOG act as peacemakers to try to bridge the growing breach caused by the allegations? Yes, if your definition of a peacemaker is to hold a meeting with both sides, telling them that serious allegations have been made (thereby increasing the suspicion of wrongdoing), but not mentioning that 2 out of 3 allegations had already been proven false. Did the AOG come in as a neutral party to resolve a church crisis? Yes, if your definition of resolution is to drag out its investigation for weeks, yet immediately demanding the church sign over all property and bank accounts to the AOG Michigan district.

After this betrayal by the AOG presbyters, the church’s elders decided to remove all references to AOG from their constitution and bylaws. How did AOG respond? With an apology? They sued the church for their property (you remember, the property purchased with $ donated by the congregation, without aid from the AOG). And when the circuit court ruled in the church’s favor, did the AOG see the light? No, they appealed the court’s decision. The appellate court sent it back down to the circuit court to decide the matter of hierarchy - is AOG hierarchical over this church? So the latest court decision is about to be made by a circuit court judge this week.

 But whatever happens…even if the corrupt religious leaders of 2007 repeat the success of their 1st-century counterparts…God will work a plan to bring good out of the evil. Perhaps part of that plan will be poetic justice. We shall see…

Incidentally, don’t let this situation turn you off to organized religion. I’m not giving up on attending church because of this. Remember what Jesus said…he said to listen to the truth that religious teachers teach, but DON’T DO AS THEY DO. Jesus clarified this by saying these teachers don’t practice what they preach, and they put obstacles in the way of people trying to get to God. Jesus didn’t let people use this as an excuse to ignore the truth of God. So, then, we must make a distinction between the truth and those who teach it. We must not fall for the logical fallacy of invalidating the message by focusing on the inconsistencies of the messenger.

But if you’re an Assembly of God church, beware of wolves in sheep’s clothing.

I recently ran across a blog written by a person who had lost their faith. They were talking about prayer and stated,

“It became obvious to me that I was talking to the air- no answers, no response of any kind…Being a scientist, I dug into the literature for any studies on the efficacy of prayer. Lo and behold, there were actual, controlled studies that had been done. And the result? Drum roll, please….. nada, nil, zip, zilch, zero… no efficacy at all.”

Below was my response. I do not link to the original blog because Jesus stated that “Things that cause people to sin must come, but woe to those they come through. It would be better for that person to have a millstone tied around their neck and cast into the sea, than for them to cause one of these little ones [innocent ones] to stumble.” In other words, I don’t want you to be influenced negatively by satan’s illegitimate arguments that have caused others to lose their faith. The faith is based on the truth, and the only way to know the truth, as I explain below, is to hear it and believe it.

This brings up an interesting presupposition. It is presupposing that science is a more accurate yardstick for measuring truth than faith. Now, I know this sounds like a cop-out, but think about this logically for a second. “The truth”, whatever that may be, is out there, and is objective, even if it is not discoverable. The truth about life, about prayer, about our existence, and whether or not our lives possess purpose, or whether our longing for purpose is meaningless in itself. The truth is self-existent…even if not a single person believes in it…even if it lies undiscovered for eons.The only way to completely ascertain an objective truth is…(to quote a phrase, “drum roll, please”)…by faith. Any other means of ascertaining truth is incomplete, and has the capability for error. For example, science relies on what we know and have observed. But science is always changing as we learn more. When we say that something is “scientificially proven”, we need to clarify which science we’re talking about. Are we talking about the science of 2007, the science of 2099, the science of 1700 (when flies spontaneously generated from meat) or the science of 1342 (when the earth was flat). Science changes. And as such, using science as a means to judge truth is like using a rubber yardstick to judge whether the golden yardstick is accurate.

What I mean when I say that faith is the only means to ascertain the truth is this: If someone tells you something that is absolutely true, then the only way you’re going to know for sure that it’s truth and to walk in the way of that truth is by taking a leap of faith, and believing in it. And the only way to do this is to first HEAR the truth. That’s why scripture says that faith comes by hearing, and hearing by a word of Christ (some translations incorrectly say “the word of God” instead of “a word of Christ”). This implies that God has the responsibility to speak to us, and we have the responsibility to listen and believe.

So what if the creator of the universe reveals “the truth” to us, and it doesn’t strike us as “the truth”. Is that because “the truth” is not true, or is it because we need to make an adjustment in our thinking? The danger is that we will use one of our rubber yardsticks (science, our feelings, logic, popular opinion, what we heard “the experts” say, what influential people in our lives have said, or a worldview appeals to us) to invalidate the golden yardstick of “truth” and adopt an untrue viewpoint. We compare the golden yardstick to our rubber yardsticks, but rather than conclude our rubber yardsticks are off, we illogically proclaim the golden yardstick to be inaccurate.

That being said, let’s examine prayer from the standpoint of scripture, not science. A scientific study of prayer will only look at prayer’s effectiveness in getting what we ask for. But scripture points out that getting what you ask for is not prayer’s purpose:

1. Jesus taught us by his example to pray, “not my will, but yours [heavenly Father's] be done.” This demonstrates that a proper balance of prayer recognizes that what God wants trumps what we want. In other words, we are to pray for what God wants to happen; our wants take a back seat.

2. Many scriptural illustrations (Job, Joseph, Jesus) show people going through great hardships and suffering that may seem purposeless from the individual’s point of view, but from God’s point of view have a purpose. It is possible those purposes may not be revealed in our lifetime. Consider someone who dies of cancer, despite all the prayers to save their life. The prophet Isaiah said, “Righteous people die…and no one understands. For the righteous man is taken away from evil to come.” But Depeche Mode looks at the same circumstance and concludes that “God has a sick sense of humor.” Who is looking at the circumstance correctly? Who has “the truth”? What about the missionary who spent an entire lifetime without a single convert, and who never lived to see that his efforts had prepared that area for a great revival when future missionaries came? We almost NEVER see God’s plan. That’s why faith is MANDATORY in order to walk in the level of God’s purposes. That’s why Jesus said we have to DENY OURSELVES in order to follow him. Again, our wants take a back seat to God’s agenda.

3. Concerning prayer, “the truth” is not determined by what we feel, whether we feel we are talking to the air or whether we feel like God is sitting right next to us. The bottom line is that “the truth” simply exists. The truth simply exists that God hears the prayer of a repentant person. Yes, the hearing of our prayers is conditional. Scripture says God will not hear selfish prayers or prayers from those who are unwilling to admit their wrongdoings (i.e. unwilling to listen to God’s voice of truth exposing our error) The truth is there. And the truth is speaking to all of us. The challenge for us is to believe the “Bible yardstick” of truth that says God is near, when our “feelings yardstick” and “logic yardstick” and “science yardstick” tell us we’re talking to the air.

Prayer must be based upon complete trust in God. Even when we are struggling with our trust in God, we must choose to open ourselves up to him again, relying on the truth of scripture that we have saturated our minds with. Our understanding of life compared to God’s is analogous to a 4-yr-old’s to his parents. The parents say, “Don’t go in in the street”, and “Don’t stick a fork in the electrical outlet.” The 4-yr-old may not be able to comprehend electrical theory, nor how his cells would be crushed by an oncoming car. The 4-yr-old is simply faced with a single momentous decision: Do I trust my parents mean the best for me, and obey them? Or do I decide that the rubber ruler of my 4-yr-old yearnings are better for me than my parents’ rules? It all boils down to trust in what God has revealed. It all comes down to faith.

I hate Santa Claus. Every year when Christmas comes around, I can’t help but think that Santa is next to the devil. Before you flame me, please realize I’m not saying that Santa is bad, or that “Saint” Nicholas was not a good, godly man. But even an angel of light can be demonic, if that angel distracts us from the salvation that is in Jesus Christ. The Bible states that Satan himself appears as an angel of light. Think about what this means. Satan is ATTRACTIVE! We’re not talking about a physical attractiveness. What this means is that Satan is compelling, and his devious ploys have an incredible charisma and charm. If we exercise no discretion in life, we’ll find ourselves just another moth lured to a crispy fried death, courtesy of a satanic “light bulb”. One of Satan’s attractive ploys (and this is an analogy) is using a few thousand dollars on this temporary earth to distract us from the 8 trillion dollars of everlasting treasure that God wants to give us in his kingdom. Yes, having a few thousand dollars is a ‘good’ thing, but those few thousand dollars are downright DIABOLICAL if they preclude us from receiving 8 trillion dollars later. (OK, so God’s reward is really worth 628.5 trillion dollars. I underestimated. Sorry.) All Satan has to do is distract people from Jesus Christ for 50 or 70 or 90 years (until they die), and he has won another soul for eternity. So here’s where the analogy hits home: Santa is not bad in and of itself. But the fact is that during the CHRISTmas season, millions of people who don’t know about the eternal life that is ONLY IN JESUS, they see Santa EVERYWHERE, yet see Jesus ALMOST NOWHERE - THAT’S BAD! It’s downright diabolical! The holiday is not called CLAUSmas, it’s CHRISTmas! Wouldn’t you be mad if people started celebrating Pee Wee Herman on Martin Luther King day, to the point where Martin Luther King was hardly mentioned anymore??? Wouldn’t you be upset if everywhere you looked on Martin Luther King day, all you saw was people dressed up like Pee Wee, but nowhere could you find the life of Martin Luther King, Jr. remembered?? Well, I’m mad that some joker in a “Santa suit” is stealing fame from the one that the Bible says every knee is going to bow down to, and whose fame will be declared by every tongue. I’m fuming that we have elevated some MYTH above God in the flesh. The “Santa” that you see pictured everywhere has ZERO resemblance to the real historical figure. Ask any kid what capabilities “Santa” has and they’ll immediately rattle off a list of MYTHICAL SUPERNATURAL traits like:

• knows if you’re naughty or nice
• lives in a fictitous place near the North Pole
• can fly with reindeer
• can squeeze down chimneys with your Mattel toys
• can visit all the children of the world in a single night
•  is still alive despite being hundreds of years old.

Meanwhile, ask the local skateboarders hanging out in your church parking lot who Jesus is, and you get a blank stare. Mission: Failed.

The principle here is similar to that described in my blog on Halloween. Something that is in itself very innocent (candy on Halloween / Santa on CHRISTmas) is used to corrupt people (introducing evil on Halloween / distracting from THE ONE WHO IS LIFE ITSELF on A HOLIDAY THAT BEARS HIS TITLE).

Here’s the lyrics of a song I wrote that express the idea. To get the full effect when reading it, get out of the mall and to your local horse stable, sit on the hay, and read away.

THE REASON FOR THE SEASON

Everyone is rushing all around
So much noise, I’m listening to the sound
of sleighbells in the snow
and Santas saying “Ho-Ho-Ho”
We’re hanging up wreaths and mistletoe
but does anyone out there really know that…

Jesus is the reason for the season
Jesus is the reason why we have a CHRISTmas
Let’s put that Santa Claus myth to bed
’cause instead
the truth is Jesus is the reason for the season

All the kids are getting into fights
Dad is wrestling with the Christmas lights
Is this what Christmas means?
Filling stockings up with jelly beans?
Have we forgotten what God went through
to bring salvation to me and you?

Jesus is the reason for the season
Jesus is the reason why we have a CHRISTmas
Let’s give that Santa Claus dude the boot
Down the chute
the truth is Jesus is the reason for the season

God came to the earth as one of us
But we’re too busy shopping Toys-R-Us
To the Christmas sales we dash
when we oughtta be having a birthday bash
So let’s shout Jesus’ birthday loud and clear
and stop tellin’ stories ’bout red-nosed reindeer

Jesus is the reason for the season
Jesus is the reason why we have a CHRISTmas
Let’s give old Santa’s elves a break
Their backs must ache
and besides, Jesus is the reason for the season

God so loved the world he sent his son
Jesus gave his life for everyone
Christmas trappings cast a spell
That blind us to Emmanuel
If Santa belonged on CHRISTmas day,
Why didn’t they call it CLAUSmas, eh?

Jesus is the reason for the season
Jesus is the reason why we have a CHRISTmas
Let’s throw our Santa Claus suits away
Yes today
The truth is Jesus is the reason for the season

Jesus gave his life up on the cross
He paid with his life, oh what a cost!
We’re buying gifts at the mall
but we miss the greatest gift of all
Jesus came down from heaven and lived with men
He suffered and died and rose again!

Jesus is the reason for the season
Jesus is the reason why we have a CHRISTmas
Stop putting your kids on Santa’s lap
He needs a nap
and besides, Jesus is the reason for the season

Jesus is the reason for the season
Jesus is the reason why we have a CHRISTmas
Jesus was born in a manger, not a sleigh
Hey-hey-hey
the truth is Jesus is the reason for the season

Lyrics copyright Onthuhlist
May be freely copied, provided author is listed as “Onthuhlist”.

“If God didn’t want us to eat cows, why’d he make them out of beef?” - Michael Tobias